I may have been less than honest about the quality of your artwork

My beautiful Janie. Daddy's little princess. I remember when you came home from the hospital, almost nine years ago, I knew you were special. And I swore then that I would always protect you from harm and provide you with everything I possibly could. Daddy loves you so much. That's why I think that it's important for me to be totally honest with you. It isn't right to lie, is it darling? No, it isn't. And daddy lied to his little girl, and now daddy wants to make it right. Jane, daddy hasn't been altogether forthcoming about the quality of your artwork.
Now it isn't that your artwork is bad, Janie. It just isn't very good. And now that you've entered in the State-wide Art Competition for Grades Three Through Five, I just don't want you to get your hopes up. I want you to do well, sweetheart, but I think daddy may have given you the wrong impression by praising your past work and displaying it on the refrigerator. Your art shows a lot of promise, Janie. Let's review some of it and maybe I can give you some constructive criticism for the future. Okay?
Now, see here, Janie? See how you drew a picture of mommy and daddy and you in front of our house? It's a nice picture, Janie, but there are some things that are clearly very wrong with it. For one thing, you made mommy and I bigger than the house. If this was an attempt at showing perspective, you really kind of missed the mark. If you wanted to show mommy and daddy in the foreground of the picture, then you should have--pay attention, Janie--you should have put the horizon around the center of the page and then placed the house and mommy and daddy accordingly. See what I'm doing, Janie? Don't cry, sweetheart. Don't cry. Daddy isn't ruining your picture. He's making it better.
And there's another thing about the horizon, Janie. You see how you put a stripe of blue way up here at the top of the page and then a stripe of green at the bottom of the page and left the middle of the page uncolored? You see that, Janie? What is this blue stripe supposed to be? It's supposed to be the sky, isn't it, Janie? But the sky doesn't look like that, does it? No, the sky is blue from wayyy above the clouds all the way down to the horizon. What you did was just lazy, wasn't it, Janie? And it was really erroneous. And it's not going to even win you third prize in the State-wide Art Competition for Grades Three Through Five. I'm sorry to have to break it to you like this, Janie.
I just want to set the record straight, my little sugarplum. Daddy is sorry for misleading you all these years. Dry your eyes, Janie. Don't cry. So you won't be a great artist someday, that's okay. Daddy still loves you. And there will always be a place at daddy's accounting firm for you. When you're older.